I'm an Aussie who moved to Ottawa, Canada in 2008. I'm always having a moan about something. This is where I moan and whinge about things. Enjoy.

Saturday 3 October 2020

Sunlife Security

So my employer gives me health benefits, via Sun Life.

Recently I have gone to the dentist twice, which was covered, and I had to have a physical exam because it was required by the MTO (Ministry of Transportation Ontario), because I have a Class B (school bus) licence, otherwise they would downgrade my licence to a normal/Class G (car) licence.

I don't drive a bus any more, and I haven't for quite a while, the last time I did was for a buddy who owns a local business providing tours of breweries in the area, with tastings, and you can pile on the bus to be driven around and it avoids any issues with drink driving (they don't let me drink anything when I'm driving either, party poopers). Anyway.. Not even sure if the physical is covered yet.

Anyway, they've sent me cheques to reimburse me for the dental expenses (which I have to pay out of pocket directly to the dentist at the time, and then Sun Life refunds me most of the cost..).

I jokingly said to the receptionist at the dentist the other day, that even though Sun Life send me a cheque, and all I have to do is open the envelope, and take a photo of the cheque with my bank's mobile app on my phone to deposit it, it's all too hard. She replied and said that I should set up direct deposit with them.

Meanwhile there's a cheque for $264, (of $277.22), sitting on my coffee table in the unopened envelope.. (Which has now been deposited via my bank's mobile app)..

I got another cheque recently, for $28, (of $29.41), for when the dentist unsuccessfully tried to pull my crown out with a slide hammer, because the cement is failing and it's falling out, a few days earlier.

This is apparently called a "crown remover", or "the extractor",
even though it is literally a slide hammer.

Maybe we should try with this one next.

I did make the requisite jokes about some string and a door knob,
and the dentist retorted about using a bow and arrow which can be more successful..

I noticed on the back of the envelopes that it says "Use your smartphone to submit your claims", I figured that I should probably do that, for the fact that I still need to claim whatever that cost of the physical was that I had to pay for a few weeks ago ($125).

Anyway, I go to their site, and try to login. It's not working. There's no login stored in LastPass, which I use for all my logins, because I am up to about eleventy billion passwords I would need to remember otherwise (slight exaggeration.. it's evidently only 424 passwords I have stored in there, according to the CSV file when I exported them all for local backup and safe keeping).

So, I try to use my usual login username and password conventions (all my sites have unique passwords now, thanks to LinkedIn and other morons getting compromised and having stored all the passwords in plain text..)


Nothing's working. Did I not create an account here at all? Fine, let's register a new one.

That's clever, the answer to the security question field is auto completed, yet there's no question selected in the dropdown box above it..

No, apparently this email address is already registered. OK, fine. Password reset time..

It was relatively painless to request the password reset email, which arrived promptly. I have this account connected to my work email address, so the reset email came up on my phone.

(I don't have my work email setup on my personal computer, and for the last 6 months my work computer has been next to me on the desk, since it seems like I'm never going back to my office (I wonder if the snacks in my drawer are past their best before date yet..), or I can just VNC to my work laptop from some other machine in the house, in case I'm sitting on the sofa to work, but my phone is in my hand..)

So we click on the link in the email to set a new password. I type in a new password and click next, and then..

What? Oh. Really?
So I only failed on 2 of those, since all my passwords are at least 11 characters long, and they all contain at least one symbol.

And wait, what? No accents?! Just 'cause I'm Australian you racist bastards. It's not like I'm the one who even has the accent. You do. I'm speaking normally.

Side note: I just had to reset my Flikr password because of nonsense with Yahoo sign ins, and usernames, and email addresses, since Flikr seems to change ownership every month.. but it does:
Requires at least 12 characters. Much better. It's ironic that a website designed solely for the public sharing of data/photos has a more secure password requirement than a site designed solely to keep confidential financial records and information private, is it not?

I give up.

Bonus content:

Submit your claim online!

As long as it's one of these rarely used types:

If you want it for any normal type of claim, like, say, medical, then.. here's a shitty paper form that you can print out and fill in, and mail to us, along with the original receipt.

But make sure you copy it, and keep it for your own records, because this is 2020, and we're still nowhere near the paperless office we've been promised since nineteen seventy fucking five. That was only 45 years ago! We can't rush these things!


I just went to get the form, to provide for example, but first I have to log back in, because I've been idle too long.. for the randomly selected period of 18 minutes. Not 15, nor 20. 18:

So we log back in, man it's hard to remember my p4ssword..

Hmm, nag me again about how I'm investing my $800 of retirement money, which maybe I'll get access to in another 30 years, although the retirement age will probably have been pushed to 115 by then, and the fees on my account will have eaten up all the money in it..

And why are you shouting at me SUN LIFE?

Too bad I don't have a partner I guess, as I could make their insurance pay the difference on my dental claims that you don't pay apparently.

Also, I've always loved the fact that people with partners get more coverage, so not only do they both have coverage, let's give them a even more, perhaps double, because obviously they are not shitty single people, who should just get sick and die because they can't afford health care, because they were a shitty person that no one even wanted in the first place.

A previous employer literally had it setup so that single people got $1000 of coverage, and people with partners/dual coverage got $2000. So between between the 2 of you people of value, you get $4k coverage, but us shitty worthless single people only deserve $1000.

And it's not like everything else is more expensive when you're single, like rent, or a mortgage, food, utility bills, car costs.. so we've all got tons of disposable income left over, to just self pay that extra $1000 coverage out of our own fucking pockets.

"Just shut up and show us the form already would you?!"

So I'll..
  • fill all that out, and/or then
  • go to Staples or somewhere else,
  • pay to use the printer and photocopier,
  • risk getting Covid touching the machines that other people have had their grubby hands and fingers all over,
  • buy an envelope (probably have to buy 50, and put the rest in a drawer that that'll get lost or forgotten by the time I need another one),
  • stuff it all in there,
  • go to the post office,
  • buy a stamp (which cost more if you only buy one, or you can buy 10, and then lose or forget the other 9 along with the 49 envelopes you don't need), and then
  • mail it off, and
  • wait who knows how long for it to be processed.

Because apparently I can't just fill in this form and click submit, and then take a photo or scan the receipt I'm claiming, and upload that.

It would probably take me longer than 18 minutes to fill in the form, and I'd get logged out before I could submit it anyway.

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